The Town Hall Archives

PonysHorses · Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2005 4:17 pm Post subject:

•• A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time." The wife responded, "Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!"

•• There was a young couple who got married and as soon as they got back from their honeymoon, the young husband sat his new wife down and told her "I'm the king of this place and you're nothin'." It bothered her for several years until one day she realized, that just made him the king over nothing.

Continental Admiral · Ornery Member Joined: 14 Nov 2003 Posts: 867

Carolita · Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2005 4:25 pm Post subject:

Continental Admiral · Ornery Member Joined: 14 Nov 2003 Posts: 867

Samwise · Posted: Thu Mar 17, 2005 11:35 pm Post subject:

My parents just equally do the job. It's not like my mom does more stuff it's just equally done.

Guest · Posted: Wed Mar 30, 2005 2:59 pm Post subject:

From Men to all women
We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from
the male side. These are our rules! Please note... these are all numbered
"1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
down. You can handle it. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us
complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon. Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one Subtle hints do not
work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what
we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact,
all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to
act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.
Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for
example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea
what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like
nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you
don't want to hear.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. ROUND is a shape.

1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch
tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping.

Bmuntz · Posted: Wed Mar 30, 2005 3:06 pm Post subject:

Very funny and some of those are so true.

Jonathan · Posted: Wed Mar 30, 2005 3:12 pm Post subject:

So very funny. My favorites:

GusDeHaan · Posted: Wed Mar 30, 2005 5:36 pm Post subject:

I never get lost, I have a cell phone in the event that I do get lost, Even if I do get lost It's only because I don't have anything to use as a refrence point.

Jonathan · Posted: Wed Mar 30, 2005 5:42 pm Post subject:

I rarely get lost and act like a fool when I do.

On the other side of that me and this gal had a good amount of time to talk while we saw more of the city than either of us wanted to.

-Jonathan