The Town Hall Archives

Paul B · Posted: Mon Dec 30, 2002 8:15 pm Post subject:

Im just glad novacom didnt make a video game system.They could have made zap azodies 2003 game and made zombies out of the kids of odyssey

Heather · Posted: Mon Dec 30, 2002 8:19 pm Post subject:

that would have been a cool episode. I wish they had made one.

Coralfish · Posted: Wed Jan 01, 2003 8:00 pm Post subject:

It kind of reminds me of a joke where a helecopter pilot and passenger loose their way in the fog, and when it clears they are near a large building. The pilot sees someone inside the building and had his passenger write on a large piece of cardboard: "WHERE ARE WE"? the person inside sees them, and soon returns with a sign that says:"YOU ARE IN A HELECOPTER". the pilot then was able to navigate his way back to the airport. Later the passenger asked him how he did it. His answer was "I knew we were by an apple/mac building, because the info they gave me was technically correct but totally useless.

(it was origionally a pro-mac joke with an IBM building, but I changed it a bit to fit the situation.Not being a particularaly mac-friendly individual myself, I tend to favor the styrofoam option .) Wink

Jared · Posted: Wed Jan 01, 2003 9:23 pm Post subject:

That's a takeoff of an older joke, which goes...

A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces
altitude and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and
shouts: "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"

The man below says: "Yes, you're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet
above this field."

"You must work in Information Technology" says the balloonist.

"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"

"Well" says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically
correct, but it's no use to anyone."

The man below says "You must work in management."

"I do" replies the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

"Well", says the man, "you don't know where you are, or where you're going, but you expect me to be able to help. You're in the same position you were before we met, but now it's my fault."

I've also seen information technology and/or management replaced with Mac User, Windows User, etc...

Coralfish · Posted: Wed Jan 01, 2003 9:54 pm Post subject:

That's interesting......I have never heard that version of it before.

David O · Posted: Thu Jan 02, 2003 11:55 am Post subject:

Here's one I've heard before, and it doesn't really insult PCs or Macs, but I think it's still funny.

(Supposedly)Real Computer Helpline Conversation

"Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?"
"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."

"What sort of trouble?"

"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."

"Went away?"

"They disappeared."

"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."

"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"

"How do I tell?"

"Can you see the C:\prompt on the screen?"

"What's a sea-prompt?"

"Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"

"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."

"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"

"What's a monitor?"

"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"

"I don't know."

"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"

"Yes, I think so."

"Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."

......."Yes, it is."

"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"

"No."

"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."

......."Okay, here it is."

"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."

"I can't reach."

"Uh-huh. Well, can you see if it is?"

"No."

"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"

"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle -- it's because it's dark."

"Dark?"

"Yes -- the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."

"Well, turn on the office light then."

"I can't."

"No? Why not?"

"Because there's a power outage."

"A power... A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"

"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."

"Good! Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."

"Really? Is it that bad?"

"Yes, I'm afraid it is."

"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"

"Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."

johnnyboy13187 · Posted: Thu Jan 02, 2003 1:45 pm Post subject:

those jokes are great Razz

Jared · Posted: Thu Jan 02, 2003 1:49 pm Post subject:

It may be what every tech support worker longs to say to a caller, but sorry, David... that WordPerfect joke's been going around for years. It's not true.

However, there are plenty of true tech support conversations that go around the internet circuit because of their utter stupidity.

David O · Posted: Thu Jan 02, 2003 2:15 pm Post subject:

Obviously it's been going around for years. (The tech support guy asks about a C:\prompt) and I figured it was made up, but it's still funny.

Paul B · Posted: Thu Jan 02, 2003 7:11 pm Post subject:

we could start a post for clean jokes but it might get out of had if new people come to the board